Here it is - the very first "celebrity" interview I ever conducted. I was 19 years old when the editor of the Daily Tar Heel's "Diversions" supplement offered me the opportunity of a lifetime: interview some woman I'd never heard of for a feature on 'Women In Rock.' Why, I'd have been a genocidal craziac to turn down such a delight! As such, I conducted no research, listened to no sample materials, and gave her a call on the morning of Sunday, September 20, 1992. It wasn't until mid-call that I realized, "Say! All these questions I came up with are in fact 'yes-no'!" But by then it was too late to rectify the situation, so I just wrote a terrible article highlighting the two or three sentence-long replies she was able to contribute. My original recording of the call is long-lost to history so I really have no idea what all the yes-no questions were. This reconstruction consists merely of the remaining fragments, as archived in the article and the track "Juliana Hatfield = Callous Bitch" from the Low-Maintenance Perennials' Jurassic Park: The Album CD. I've no illusions that this interview is of any interest, but www.markprindle.com is no stranger to controversy and now's no time to start. My million questions are in bold; her infinite number of responses are in regular text.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Man Answering Phone, Possibly Evan Dando of Lemonheads and Heroin that Killed Nikki Sudden Fame, as He Was Living With Hatfield at the Time: Hello?

Um, could I speak to Juliana? Hatfield.

Evan Dando: Yeah, hold on.

Juliana Hatfield: Hello?

(in funny 'excited' voice): HELLO!?

Hello?

Um, hello! Um, I'm Mark Prindle, calling from Chapel Hill.

Hi!

So how do you feel being categorized as a 'Woman In Rock'?

It kinda sucks, because people can't deal with that. People call it that, and there's no such thing as 'Men In Rock.' It doesn't really matter. I'm not writing about men or women - I'm writing about people.

Why did you break up your old band, the Blake Babies?

I couldn't stand to keep doing it. I didn't like it anymore.

(*asks yes-no question*)

Yeah!

(*asks yes-no question*)

No, what?

(*clarifies yes-no question*)

Yeah.

(*asks yes-no question*)

Yeah.

(*asks yes-no question*)

Yeah.

(*asks yes-no question*)

Yeah.

(*asks yes-no question*)

Yeah.

(*asks yes-no question*)

(proudly) Yeah!

So have you gotten all caught up in the Seattle grunge explosion?

Well, I could care less really.

(*door slams loudly in hall*) I'm sorry.

It's just hype, you know? People like to make a big deal out of anything they can. But I think there are bands that people aren't talking about that are really good in Seattle, like the Screaming Trees and Mudhoney.

So what's your final word on the 'Women In Rock' phenomenon?

People come in all different shapes and sizes, and you have to look at each person individually. That's all.

------------------------------------------

See???? Wasn't it AWESOME!?!? Now if somebody out there could find a copy of my 1993 radio interview with The Cows, we'd have a full set!

Reader Comments

briggsh@pacbell.net
Hey- HEYYYYY!!!! Wait, just a minute, thar... Juliana Hatfield is probably one the most underrated talents in the american rock scene. She's the Johnny Cash of girls hopelessly devoted to dysfunction, self doubt and junkie boyfriends. Listen to "Only Everything" and everything after that. Beautiful stuff, mang. Wanna know what one of those strippers at your local pole vaulting joints feels like when she comes home to her wannabe rockstar/junkie boyfriend and finds everything's gone to hock then listen to a Juliana song. Makes me wanna jump off a cliff or prevents me from jumping off of one? She's the real McCoy. That's why your friends call you, dick.

Back to Mark Prindle's Hostile Work Environment For Slits